Archive for arby’s

Quality Fast Food: Kelly’s Roast Beef

Posted in Beef, Kelly's Roast Beef, REVIEWS [Restaurants], STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , , , , on April 30, 2009 by chomposaurus

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On my recent triumphant return to the Chomposaurus breeding grounds of Boston, MA, I visited a mecca of meat that I had strangely neglected during my initial tenure there. Kelly’s Roast Beef has a few locations in the Boston area (for this review we went to the original at Revere Beach), pumping out metric tons of sandwiches, fried foods and chowder to the hungry New England masses. Indeed, my carnivorous companion Wyoming Rose and I were amazed that “Medium Onion Ring” equaled a literal half-a-square-foot cube of deep-fried flaky battered rings. Needless to say we did not finish them, even though they were flaky, fresh and gigantic.

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Before I move on to the main attraction, a warning: do not order the large roast beef sandwich unless you have resigned yourself to an early, coronary-propelled grave. Kelly’s Large Roast Beef Sandwich is two solid hockey pucks’ worth of moist meat packed precariously into a buttery yellow bun. I had difficulty putting it into my mouth, and believe me I have a big mouth. Only the use of generous amounts of barbecue sauce as lube allowed for easy digestion. Well, that and the beef was out of this world. It was as though your local Arby’s had gone to the neighborhood deli and gotten their best brisket for their sandwiches. You won’t top Kelly’s for quality of fast food roast beef. I was fortunate in that I needed a lot of it, too, since I was loading up for the Boston Marathon. Not to run it, mind you; but to be able to absorb the six hours of beer that watching it from the street requires.

Rose and I were also impressed with the quality of the service. You see, when the beefsmith taking our order asked what we wanted on our sandwiches, I foolishly said “everything,” figuring this was a Chicago Vienna Dog type situation. He paused and looked up at me. “Really?” He said, “Everything is pretty disgusting.” He listed about 20 items, most of which would not go together. I settled for cheese, onions, pickles and barbecue sauce – a good choice, although horseradish was also tempting. They also had no problem giving us extra buckets of bbq sauce to dip our rings in. Hooray for Yankee kindness.

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So if you have a hankering for the best beef you can eat in 10 minutes or less, Kelly’s is your place. And perhaps, finally, I have found someone to help me forget my first true roast beef love, Rax. Although it’s hard to replace lemonade served in a plastic alligator.

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Finally I can have Arby’s Roast Beef on my Wendy’s Chicken Sandwich

Posted in Fast Food, MEAT POLITICS with tags , , on April 24, 2008 by chomposaurus

Giant Hats Don\'t LieAccording to various news sources, the conglomerate investment corporation known as Triarc – aka the owner of Arby’s – bought the red-headed lass, Wendy’s. Of course, I don’t eat at either place, because their meat comes from tortured, chemically-altered animals, their restaurants are filthy, and their workers are generally mistreated. But Arby’s used to be my favorite – I think they put something on that beef to make it extra sweet, and Wendy’s has the best fried chicken sandwich of any fast food dump. The chance to combine the two creates some interesting mental pictures. Sadly, though, they won’t be combining the restaurants… probably a good thing, since anytime I drive by a combo Pizza Hut/Taco Bell/Long John Silver’s I throw up in my mouth a little.

I’ll say this: Dave probably wouldn’t approve of his daughter being bought and sold like a common whore. But he would approve of her getting $4.2 billion… anything under 4 and he’d be rolling in his grave. Which I assume is a giant deep fryer filled with liquid gold and kept at a constant temperature of 400 degrees Fahrenheit.