Archive for the STUFF ABOUT MEAT Category

Stephen Colbert Tears Down the Meat Wall

Posted in STUFF ABOUT MEAT on March 20, 2009 by chomposaurus

Stephen Colbert is a patriot, but even he knows we can’t rely on traditional sources of meat forever. It gives foreign meat cartels too much control. So he went out and found the leading meat-culture scientist to see how we could grow our own “alternative” meat here at home. Here’s the interview. Colbert didn’t say “Meat Wall,” but you know he was thinking it.

(Stupid WordPress.com won’t let me embed the video, so here’s the link.)

Tonguing the Lens

Posted in STUFF ABOUT MEAT on March 17, 2009 by chomposaurus

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Scanwiches: somebody posts hi-res scans of their sandwiches. Hey, why not? Here’s a tongue sandwich:

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Word of the Day: Speckmantel

Posted in Pork, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , , on March 10, 2009 by chomposaurus

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German, meaning “Bacon Jacket.” Our loyal correspondent P. Sundae sends this brief dispatch:

…saw this in the grocery store and thought you would enjoy it. It’s a wienerli wearing a Speckmantel (that’s a real German word, and yes, it means “Bacon Jacket”) and carrying a cheese wheel on its back.

Apparently the word is usually used to describe bacon-wrapped foods. I think I shall start referring to such delicacies this way; for example, “that filet is wearing a bacon jacket.”

Scrapple(con)quest: Victory at Brunch; or, How I Ate Some Scrapple

Posted in KNOW YOUR PIG, KNOW YOUR SAUSAGE, Pork, STRANGE MEAT, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , , on March 9, 2009 by chomposaurus

Offal comes when you least expect it. There I was, sitting down to brunch at Egg, one of Brooklyn’s trenderias, when I noticed it under the meats section of the menu: “Scrapple, fresh from our farm, $3.” Would sweet success only cost me $3? Yes, especially if I convinced my dining companion to order the other thing I wanted to try, the candied bacon (coated in hard syrup candy, just as good as it sounds).

This grainy image is the only footage we have of scrapple in the wild.

This grainy image is the only footage we have of scrapple in the wild.

But after my long months of waiting, would scrapple live up to its expectations? After all, scrapple is hog offal (heart, liver, head etc.) combined with cornmeal and mush, typically eaten in parts of Pennsylvania, so it may be a regionally acquired taste. Let me assure you, though, that it is much better than it sounds. It was fried into moist little patties, which had the consistency of hashbrowns. The taste was similar to corned beef hash, but with a fattier tang, like lamb. I’m not sure if supermarket scrapple would be this good, but with such strong flavors it would be hard to go wrong.

So having conquered scrapple in its natural environment, I’ll be tackling it next on my home turf: cooking scrapple in my kitchen. Stay tuned to this space to see if I survive.

Bacon Today, Bacon Tomorrow

Posted in STUFF ABOUT MEAT on March 4, 2009 by chomposaurus

July 7, 2008: The Internets declare Baconmania to have arrived.

January 27, 2009: The Internets decide Baconmania has passed.

And you know what we say to that, loyal Chomposaurites: it’s all a bunch of hogwash. Because we’re still sitting back and inhaling some sizzling apple-smoked strips, and we don’t care whether anyone has it on their t-shirt or wallet or alarm clock. Bacon is here to stay, and something doesn’t have to be hip to be delicious. I am, however, looking forward to a reduction in the cost of bacon when people stop wrapping things in it just to be trendy.

(Image: Silhouette Masterpiece Theatre)

Corn Dog Pizza; Or, Why You Will Soon Be Fatter

Posted in Hot Dogs, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , on February 10, 2009 by chomposaurus

From the beautifully simple new blog, This is why you’re fat.

Review: Bacon Pancakes

Posted in Pork, REVIEWS [Restaurants], STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , , on February 6, 2009 by chomposaurus

While visiting DC for the inauguration, I had the good fortune to stumble into Marx Cafe in Mt. Pleasant for brunch. Our motley crew of hungry, hungover men soon spotted bacon pancakes on the menu and decided we had to try some. We ordered a stack for the table and dug in.

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I was expecting little bits of bacon to be mixed into the batter. Little did I know they would meld whole strips of bacon into the flapjack, as though they were pouring the batter on top of them. While I admire the culinary swagger it takes to place an intact piece of bacon inside a pancake, I must say it probably lessened the overall effectiveness of the flavor combination. It simply tasted like you had stabbed a piece of bacon on your fork, then stabbed some pancake, then rubbed it all in syrup. Delicious? Yes. But hardly original. You can do the same at Denny’s by ordering bacon with your grand slam.

So I may have to make my own bacon pancakes to get the unique, meaty-batter experience I was looking for. And trust me, you’ll be the first to know about it.

Know Your Pig: The All-Pork BBQ Burrito of Destiny

Posted in KNOW YOUR PIG, Pork, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , on January 26, 2009 by chomposaurus

BBQ Addicts brings you the Bacon Explosion, a creation that makes Chipotle look like a haven for vegans and children. Behold:

baconexplosion

2 pounds thick cut bacon
2 pounds Italian sausage
1 jar of your favorite barbeque sauce
1 jar of your favorite barbeque rub

Obama at Ben’s Chili Bowl: Our New President Knows How To Eat

Posted in Hot Dogs, MEAT POLITICS, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , on January 13, 2009 by chomposaurus

So, in case you haven’t heard the biggest meat news of the week, President-Elect Obama visited one of the best fast-food joints in the country, Ben’s Chili Bowl. Here’s the video:

Ben’s Chili Bowl is a 24-hour mecca in D.C., a city that generally shuts down by 1 in the morning. I stumbled in many times after a concert at the 9:30 Club, in desperate need of some chili cheese fries, praying to Allah that there would be a cabbie willing to take me back to Georgetown after I stuffed myself. Follow Barack’s lead and visit next time you’re in the District.

Xmas Gifts You Didn’t Get #3: MeatWater

Posted in MEAT GIFTS, STRANGE MEAT, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags on January 7, 2009 by chomposaurus

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Is it a joke? Well, yes. The question you really have to ask yourself is: if these were for real, would you try them? If you answered yes, then congratulations, you’re a freak like me. I’m especially curious about the Rocky Mountain Oysters. Also, think of the many everyday applications: wouldn’t the traditional football-game-victory gatorade-soaking of the coach be more fitting if it was done with a cooler of Beef Jerky Water? And what better way to refresh yourself during a marathon than by splashing your face with a cup of hardy MRE Pork Chop Water (11 grams of fat per serving)? The possibilities are endless.

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Thanks to The Postman for tipping me off about this great business plan.