Archive for the BBQ Category

Fly Me to the Moo (and other awesome custom grills)

Posted in BBQ with tags , on September 15, 2008 by chomposaurus


BBQ Pits by Klose, a company that could only truly thrive in Texas, creates some of the world’s most original grills. I stumbled upon their site and found pictures of some truly mind-blowing creations, including the 38,000 plane-shaped smoker above made for Continental Airlines and the 22-foot tall grill made for Discovery’s “BIG” program (at a cost of only 30 grand).

And yes, that baby carriage is a smoker. Go here and click on “Unique Pits” for more custom smokers, including a mailbox and a miniature train.


They also cooked the world’s largest hotdog. It weighed 280 pounds and took six men to carry – just like a coffin, which is fitting because if you ate this sucker, your chances of surviving are basically nil.

A Farm Boy Empathizes

Posted in BBQ, Fowl, MEAT POLITICS, Pork, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , , , , on August 1, 2008 by chomposaurus

New York Times columnist Nicholas Kristof, who usually manages to impress me only with the stubborn denial of his neoconservatism, wrote a great piece this week about California’s Prop 2, which, if approved, would keep factory farms from raising hogs, chickens or veal in small cages. Anyone concerned with eating healthier, more humane meat should support this initiative. Similar ballot measures have passed in Florida, Oregon, Arizona and Colorado.

But the best part of the column comes when Kristof describes his own experience slaughtering geese on his family farm.

Then there were the geese, the most admirable creatures I’ve ever met… Once a month or so, we would slaughter the geese. When I was 10 years old, my job was to lock the geese in the barn and then rush and grab one. Then I would take it out and hold it by its wings on the chopping block while my Dad or someone else swung the ax.

The 150 geese knew that something dreadful was happening and would cower in a far corner of the barn, and run away in terror as I approached…

Very often, one goose would bravely step away from the panicked flock and walk tremulously toward me. It would be the mate of the one I had caught, male or female, and it would step right up to me, protesting pitifully. It would be frightened out of its wits, but still determined to stand with and comfort its lover.

I tried to pet a goose when I was a small child, and it responded by pursuing me with ferocity. At the time I thought all geese were crazy; now I understand that there was probably something more going on. People are already weirded out by eating cute animals (cats and rabbits being unpopular for bbq’s); will they soon be just as repulsed by eating smart ones? Geese and pigs, as Kristof writes, “adhere to family values that would shame most of those who dine on them.”

Is there a slippery slope between this and vegetarianism, or at least (flavor-of-the-month vocab word) pescatarianism? It’s difficult to imagine that. I like to think that it’s a path where our awareness of animal rights leads us to eat a healthier and more sustainable amount of meat. Hopefully, states like Florida and California will take the lead in making sure that meat is humanely raised.

Know Your Cow: Brisket

Posted in BBQ, Beef, Brisket, KNOW YOUR COW with tags , , , , , on July 30, 2008 by chomposaurus


Brisket (from the Old Norse “brjōsk”) is cut from the lower chest of the cow, which is frequently called the breast. It’s usually split into a first and second cut, for a total weight of 7 to 9 pounds. As one of the toughest parts of a cow, brisket can’t be grilled like a traditional steak. It takes careful marinating and seasoning to prepare and then has to cook for many hours. It’s especially popular in Texas (sold by the pound or by the sandwich), where rumor has it that two German brothers who owned a meat market began smoking brisket as a way to use their excess meat.

Brisket is cheap. A massive 7 pound block will run you only 30 or 40 dollars. That’s why it’s so popular for BBQ’s: because you can feed a lot of people without spending a fortune. It’s also popular because it’s effing delicious.


Real men smoke their brisket. Not by coincidence, real women also smoke their brisket. You better believe Rachel McAdams smokes her brisket. Mine, too. If you happen to be so unlucky as to not yet own a Big Green Egg (I assume by reading this site, you must be at least aspiring to own one), then you can also slow cook your brisket in an oven or a very large slow cooker. Just make sure you rub it with as much spice as humanly possible first.

To cook a whole brisket, you need to take off most of the fat, leaving just a thin layer for cooking. Your butcher will have no problem doing this for you; not so sure about asking the high school student that works at Safeway.

And don’t forget, it’s great for Hanukkah!

First BBQ on Mars

Posted in BBQ with tags , on June 5, 2008 by chomposaurus


As many of our geekier readers (that is, all of you) know, Nasa’s Phoenix Lander recently touched down on the polar ice cap of Mars. It’s equipped with a variety of instruments, including:

[A] small oven that will heat the scooped-up dirt and ice to 1,800 degrees Fahrenheit.

The purpose of the oven is to vaporize particles to look for minerals, etc that could indicate the presence of life in the past. But wait! Let’s say there happens to be a little bugger still alive down there, a bacteria or some such speck defying the odds. That dude gonna get fried, and he gonna get fried good. Meaning: the Phoenix lander could potentially be hosting the first interplanetary BBQ. Sadly, we won’t be there to sample the resulting single-celled burgers, but I bet they would have that rusty red crust that Mars is so famous for. Mmmm, iron oxide. Freshens the breath and strips all that pesky enamel right off the teeth!

Now It’s Easier to BBQ Daffy & Donald

Posted in BBQ, Fowl, Hot Dogs with tags on May 28, 2008 by chomposaurus


Just in time for summer, D’artagnan has introduced their Duck Dog… which is a hot dog made out of free-range organic ducks. Why on earth hasn’t someone thought of this before? The fact that we haven’t yet tried one of these is just dethpicable.

Also available are premium beef, buffalo and pork… click below for the info from the press release. Picture is from the NYTimes.
Continue reading

Know Your Pig: Pork Neck

Posted in BBQ, KNOW YOUR PIG, Pork, Pork Neck with tags , on May 27, 2008 by chomposaurus


For our Memorial Day BBQ, “Big Meat Mike” brought over some big ass pork necks he’d been marinating in curry sauce for several hours. I’d never eaten them before, but they were giant hunks of meat from a pig so I was not afraid.


Situated directly forward of the shoulder, pork neck comes from the bones of the pig’s spine closest to the head. When barbecued, the result can best be described as the combination of a good pork rib with a chicken wing. It’s easiest to eat it with your hand, and you’ll encounter a lot of globs of tasty but possibly chewy fat. The flavor was that of a very juicy, very fatt pork chop. It’s not for the faint of heart, literally: your arteries will feel this one. Also, the marinade didn’t seem to effect the taste of the meat, but it probably made it easier to eat by juicing it up.

Pork neck, which is the same as “pork neck bones” (a term for the meat of the neck, including the bones), is also popular boiled with vegetables. No matter how you prepare it, you’re in for one of the more adventurous pork experiences.

Happy Barbecue Season!

Posted in BBQ, Meat Devices with tags , , , on May 26, 2008 by chomposaurus

It’s Memorial Day, the first day of the Official 2008 BBQ Season in the Northern Hemisphere! GI Joe & Chomposaurus encourage you to watch this brief video regarding grilling safety:

For more (read: real) information, check out the FDNY’s Grilling Tips.

I’d like to add a few of my own:

  1. If you’re a filthy hippy, wash your nappy hair so the oils in it won’t burst into flame.
  2. Do not attempt to grill in a moving vehicle unless that vehicle is a Chevy El Camino.
  3. Taking your George Foreman Grill out onto the porch DOES NOT COUNT as grilling once official grilling season has begun, and you will be penalized for it.
  4. Tempting as it might be, don’t grill your feelings. The smoke will only make things worse.


Happy grilling – Chomp O’Saurus will be back tomorrow with more delicious meat.