Archive for the MEAT GIFTS Category

X-Mas Gifts You Didn’t Get #4: Gerald Orlowski’s Patented Onion Ring Machine

Posted in MEAT GIFTS on January 8, 2009 by chomposaurus

A necessity for anyone who likes to prepare their own nutritious onion rings with their meat. They’re chock-full of folic acid!

onion ring machine!

Xmas Gifts You Didn’t Get #3: MeatWater

Posted in MEAT GIFTS, STRANGE MEAT, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags on January 7, 2009 by chomposaurus

Is it a joke? Well, yes. The question you really have to ask yourself is: if these were for real, would you try them? If you answered yes, then congratulations, you’re a freak like me. I’m especially curious about the Rocky Mountain Oysters. Also, think of the many everyday applications: wouldn’t the traditional football-game-victory gatorade-soaking of the coach be more fitting if it was done with a cooler of Beef Jerky Water? And what better way to refresh yourself during a marathon than by splashing your face with a cup of hardy MRE Pork Chop Water (11 grams of fat per serving)? The possibilities are endless.


Thanks to The Postman for tipping me off about this great business plan.

Xmas Gifts You Didn’t Get #2: Bacon Floss

Posted in MEAT GIFTS on January 6, 2009 by chomposaurus


No, I will not be reviewing the bacon floss. Why? Cause flossing’s for jerks! Where’s the wintergreen bacon variety? After all, I love to smother my bacon-wrapped lamb chop in mint jelly.

Xmas Gifts You Didn’t Get #1: Origami Hamburger

Posted in MEAT GIFTS on January 5, 2009 by chomposaurus

Get your fold on here. Note: a randomly polled group of eaters could detect no difference between the origami fish sandwich and McDonald’s patented Filet-o-fish.