Archive for May, 2009

Review: Lava Lake Lamb – Ground Lamb

Posted in Burgers, Organic Mail Order Meat with tags on May 15, 2009 by chomposaurus

This month, Lava Lake Lamb, purveyors of fine organic baby sheep, were kind enough to not only kill and butcher some sweet little delicious sheep for me, they even agreed to send them to my house for free. I got a one pound packet of ground organic lamb, and did what any good American would do: I made me some burgers.

One of the best things about lamb is that it’s far more forgiving than beef for the amateur cook – it cooks more slowly and more evenly, and it does not lose nearly as much flavor between medium-rare and medium as a piece of steak will. That’s not to say you should burn it, of course. I cooked these burgers in the broiler – following Mark Bittman’s recipe for lamb burgers with cumin and onion. After 11 minutes they came out just right, pink in the middle but not red.

The taste? Well that was divine. Lamb does indeed have a gamier flavor than beef, but it has a finer texture. This lamb was extremely juicy and it was enhanced by but not lost to the spices and onions. Generous portions of ketchup and mustard also aided the cause. But most remarkable is the sheer quantity of taste packed into each bite. With high quality meat, more flavor almost always means better flavor, and Lava Lake’s ground lamb is no exception. I suggest heading over to their site and ordering a pound or two today to try for yourself.

Next we’ll be attempting to roast one of their boneless legs of lamb. Wish us luck!

Shady Meat Review: Armour Treet Luncheon Loaf

Posted in Armour Treet, KNOW YOUR SHADY MEAT with tags , on May 14, 2009 by chomposaurus

My local hipster bodega in Williamsburg, Brooklyn has a small section catering to old polish ladies and truly starving artists that sells meat product-in-a-can. Of course, SPAM is well-represented, but I noticed several other varieties, some distinctly foreign in origin. I’ve decided to try a few over the course of the summer, hoping that my disgust will lead to your entertainment. And who knows, I may find a bargain delight! Actually I do know. There is no way any of these will be good. Example one is Armour Treet, a SPAM rip-off in both concept and marketing.

Why is the Treet at the edge of the plate in the picture? Well, you see, as soon as I squirted the loaf from the can, it began to sweat a translucent mucous. Within seconds the pool was big enough that the meat was sliding around the plate at the slightest of touches, and settled at the edge. Honestly trying to get it to sit still in the middle was too creepy and too much trouble.

I sliced it off and boldly put a bit in my mouth. The taste… tuna fish in prison is the best I could come up with. The salted-heavy-metal taste barrels you over, truly raw and stinking. There is no way that this is made up anything but the worst part of the animals. The added smoke flavor doesn’t help, because who wants to eat smoked ass? They could at least work on making it smell nice.

I fried it, too. So then the Treet was hot… and nasty. Somehow the heat made it seem more “fresh,” and not in the good way – “fresh” the way the floor of a horse barn is fresh. I guess if you put enough American cheese in your sandwich you might be able to mask the flavor, but honestly, just spend the extra 30 cents and get some bologna. There’s absolutely no reason to buy Armour Treet, unless you’re running a grease-and-shovel racket.

Obama Gets a Burger in Hell

Posted in Burgers, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags on May 5, 2009 by chomposaurus

What better way to celebrate Cinco de Mayo then treating Joe Biden (and half the Washington Press Corp) to some bunned steak from Ray’s Hell-Burger, the famously horror-movie-themed beefery in Arlington, VA? There’s excellent video below, in which you can hear how Obama likes his burger, as well as the great moment when the owner, Tim Murray, has to explain to the President of the United States that they don’t do french fries, they do fried cheddar cheese potato balls.

VIDEO here.

Some reviews of Ray’s here, here and here. a

The Real Swine Flu is Caused by Eating Too Much Damn Ham

Posted in STUFF ABOUT MEAT on May 1, 2009 by chomposaurus

This concert poster is cool and relevant.

This concert poster is cool and relevant.

I know some of you won’t like to hear this, but you can’t eat steak and ham two meals a day and enjoy the benefits of our society’s advances in healthcare. You may as well be smoking two packs and drinking a fifth of cinnamon schnapps every day too. And unless you are as rich as Lord Heinrich Goldschlager himself, you’re probably eating pretty terrible meat anyway. I’ll let the NYTimes say the rest.

There was a time when red meat was a luxury for ordinary Americans, or was at least something special: cooking a roast for Sunday dinner, ordering a steak at a restaurant. Not anymore. Meat consumption has more than doubled in the United States in the last 50 years.

Now a new study of more than 500,000 Americans has provided the best evidence yet that our affinity for red meat has exacted a hefty price on our health and limited our longevity.

The study found that, other things being equal, the men and women who consumed the most red and processed meat were likely to die sooner, especially from one of our two leading killers, heart disease and cancer, than people who consumed much smaller amounts of these foods.