England is turning American squirrels into meat pies

I kid you not. This article – from a reputable U.K. newspaper – contains a recipe for Squirrel Pasty. Made from grey squirrel, a.k.a. what you see in parks across the United States, because England’s red squirrel is endangered. I’m not sure which to be more upset about – the fact that squirrel meat is “selling like hotcakes,” or the fact that the squirrels could soon be coming from here.

Ok, ok. England has a healthy supply of greys that can probably satisfy their urges for pasties and melts for years to come. But you never know when the squirrel burrito or the squirrel curry will take off, and the redcoats will come a’knockin on the cash-strapped Park Service’s door. Although I suppose healthy squirrel exports might help our economy. I will try and put on a patriotic face… but I don’t want the furry little nutgobblers from my local playground ending up as someone’s drunken snack in Northumberland.

3 Responses to “England is turning American squirrels into meat pies”

  1. “…the furry little nutgobblers from my local playground…”

    I’m confused…the British are eating our gay midget anthropomorphic animal pederasts? Shit.

  2. Dean Jones Says:

    well i mayself think its a cocka shit cuz iv never seen squirrel pie’s or pastrys in any of the bakers round here… and beside which why would we want to eat ur shitty squirrels when we have got our own little nutcracking pests…

  3. Tis true good peeps, we love grey squirrels over here. Curently they go for around £3.50 each which is around $5.60.
    They taste like a cross between lamb and duck. For me the best way is to slow cook them and the meat just falls off the bone. Don’t be fooled into the thought of pasty munching brits, we do love gourmet food as well,lol.

    I guess it’s a way of starting to control the little blighters which number over 2million where as our native red only number around 155 to 160,000 and in parts of the UK they are extinct and in general on the endangered list.

    After all they were imported centuries ago for hunting…

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