Archive for June, 2008

Sunday Protein: McSweeney’s New Food Reviews

Posted in STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , on June 29, 2008 by chomposaurus

McSweeney’s Internet Tendency contains a lengthy section of sly reviews of new food products, from grocery store chicken fries to a mother-in-law’s bad pasta. Don’t worry, there’s plenty of meat.

The bottle says Gatorade A.M. helps put back the fluids and energy you lose during a full night’s sleep, to which I reply: “It’s about time.” Finally, someone has engineered an athletic drink for people like me, Athletes of Sleep—people for whom it is less physically taxing to be awake than asleep.

I had to try it. So recently, after a thoroughly exhausting night of sleeping, I woke up with orange-strawberry. I quickly regained all the energy I lost by sleeping so hard.

Truth in Advertising, Part 1

Posted in Fast Food with tags , , on June 27, 2008 by chomposaurus

There\'s a Reason Your Dog Won\'t Eat It

National Country Ham Association

Posted in Pork, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , on June 26, 2008 by chomposaurus


I did not make up the title of this post – I discovered it while researching yesterday’s post about The Silver Skillet. The National Country Ham Association “was organized in 1992 to represent the interest of Country Ham Producers nationwide. Membership includes some fifty processor, supplier and academia advisor members.” What is a country ham? Shockingly enough, the NCHA provides no defintion on their website, although they don’t hesitate to tell me where to buy one. So, Wikipedia comes through yet again.

Country hams are salt- and nitrate-cured for about a month and may be hardwood (usually hickory and red oak) smoked, then aged for several months to a year. Whole country hams must be scrubbed and soaked for many hours prior to consumption in order to remove the salt cure.


But the best info comes from countryhams.com, where we learn that the best country hams are covered in mold:

Mold in no way affects the quality of the meat but rather indicates proper aging. It is a perfectly normal occurrence on a genuine country ham. Don’t worry about it, as it is a natural process that occurs very similar to the molding in fine aged cheese. If mold appears on the whole ham, this may be safely removed by washing the ham, using two parts water and one part vinegar.

Let’s hope we can get a few to review… I don’t have the facilities for curing ham. Yet.

Country Ham at The Silver Skillet

Posted in Pork, Restaurant Hams, REVIEWS [Restaurants] with tags , on June 25, 2008 by chomposaurus


On the last weekend of my swing through the south, Ian and I stopped at The Silver Skillet in Atlanta, where we were determined to try an authentic Country Ham. This ham is distinguished from a normal ham by its high sodium content. It’s so salty, in fact, that the when I ordered the waitress said, “You know that’s real salty, babe.” What makes a ridiculously salty ham even better? A bowl of red-eye gravy for dipping… that’s even saltier than the ham itself.

If you like a little meat with your salt, it’s highly recommended. And yes, after all that, Ian ordered bacon too…

The Heavy Dog

Posted in Hot Dogs, QUALITY FAST FOOD, The Varsity with tags , on June 24, 2008 by chomposaurus


us take a moment to celebrate the Heavy Dog, found only at The Varsity in Georgia. This particular specimen was photographed at the Athens branch. It’s a fairly small, normal hotdog, placed on a bun that is wide enough for at least three jumbo hotdogs. This entire bread bucket is then filled to the brim with luscious, finely-ground chili chunks and topped with a line of cheese. If you are a chili dog afficianado, then this is your fast food city of gold. And don’t forget your frosted orange…
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Quoth the Raven, “More Chili”

Posted in Restaurant Burgers, REVIEWS [Restaurants] with tags , , , on June 23, 2008 by chomposaurus


Yes, just when you thought you’d eaten giant slabs of meat in every environment possible, Sullivan’s Island in SC produces Poe’s Tavern, an Edgar Allen Poe-themed restaurant that happens to serve a variety of creative and magnificently chunky half-pound burgers.


I had the black cat, which is what you see pictured here. It includes drunken chili, bacon and pimento cheese. It was the pimento cheese that really intrigued me; I’d never had it with a burger before. It went perfectly with the chili, the sour tang mixing well with the sweet chili and the perfectly cooked beef. Order medium here; you’ll get medium rare. The burger itself is a big round ball, ike a giant meatball made of the south’s best heifers.

The full menu, including the Pit & Pendulum, the Tamerlane and the Tell-Tale Heart, is available here.

For the record, you can get all of these with grilled chicken instead of beef, if the beef bells aren’t ringing for you. And yes, that was a Poe attempt at humor… yikes.

The Dutch Oven

Posted in VIDEOS with tags , on June 20, 2008 by chomposaurus

Chomposaurus is in the south eating some delicious meat this week, hence the sporadic posts. Please enjoy this video of America’s best cooking show until we’re back at full strength next week.

Listen to Our Radio Station… and Perish!

Posted in Burgers, Fast Food, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , , , on June 18, 2008 by chomposaurus

Driving through quiet Bladenboro, NC yesterday, I had my radio tuned to KZQ: Myrtle Beach’s station for New Rock. After rocking out alongside the corn and tobacco to “Cult of Personality”, I was intrigued by the station’s newest competition, where you could “fill up for free for a year.” Apparently, you got free gas on the station – not bad considering it now costs something like eight million dollars per cubic inch for sweet, light crude. Then I heard the second way they would fill you up:

A grand prize winner will be randomly drawn from all entries to win… 52 Hardee’s 1/3 Thickburger certificates- good for a whole year’s worth of great sandwiches.

My friends, Hardee’s Prime Rib Thickburger contains 48 grams of fat, 780 calories and 1480 mg of Sodium. This radio station is giving you a year’s supply of death. Or 40,000 calories, 2500 grams of fat and 77,000 mg of sodium to be exact. It’s probably best you don’t call in and stick with ham on rye instead.

Although given current gas prices, you could probably make a killing liquefying the burgers and selling them as ethanol at the side of the road.

Piglet on your Plate

Posted in Pork, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags , , on June 17, 2008 by chomposaurus

The Bacon Turducken?

Sunday Protein: Better Ways to Eat Meat

Posted in Fast Food, MEAT POLITICS, STUFF ABOUT MEAT with tags on June 15, 2008 by chomposaurus

…that’s not how most people would put the subject of this post. They would say “How to eat less meat,” which might seem more honest. But that’s not the problem here, really. If you’re a typical American, you should probably eat less of a lot of things; I’d cut down on french fries and spicy sweet Doritos before buying fewer chicken cutlets. Along the way, you can develop better meat-eating habits as well. The NYTimes has a good guide, with seven steps.

6. Make some rules. Depending on your habits, it may be no bacon at breakfast; it may be no burgers at lunch; it may be no fast food, ever; it may be “eat a salad instead of a sandwich three times a week,” or “eat a vegetarian dinner three times a week.” It may mean meatless Fridays. It may mean (this is essentially what I do) meatless breakfasts and lunches and all-bets-are-off dinners.

Some of the steps are a bit silly, like suggesting that you order “two salads” instead of a main course in a restaurant. First, it’s pretty hard to find two good salads in a restaurant that don’t have much meat (bacon vinaigrette anyone?) Second, I think you look kind of crazy doing that in Chili’s.

Anyhow, read the article. Its main advice is very sound: when eating at home, choosing to eat less meat, but eating it in more creative fashions, will lead you to a healthier diet. And don’t forget to cut out the junk food, too.