Chicago’s Duck Torture Speakeasies
I’m a fan, as you might have guessed from the existence of this blog, of meat that comes from a cow served organic food and taken from this world painlessly. I’m not so much a fan of meat that comes from tortured ducks. However I recognize that some of you don’t care that much about ducks; some of you may actively hate ducks. And you duck despisers could very well live in Chicago, a place that is becoming known for its duck torture underground.
Of course, the meat I’m talking about is foie gras, which was banned in Chicago circa 2006.
Now, according to my sources in the restaurant industry there, you can easily find it in the best restaurants in the Windy City. All you have to do is utter the code word, which is an ingredient that does not usually show up in U.S. restaurants. This ingredient will either be on the menu or available as a special you can ask for; apparently, some gourmet places even offer full (and fully confidential) foie gras tasting menus.
I won’t be telling you the secret word, because I don’t want to get anyone in trouble or see any more ducks end up in Gitmo. But it’s good to keep in mind that just because some crazed alderman bans something doesn’t mean people are going to stop eating it. Now I wonder how I can get my Papaya Dogs fried in transfatty oil? Maybe if I ask for them to be “Bloomberged”?